Sorry, But It Ain't Kosher...

As I am preparing for the "big one" this weekend, I've been reflecting on the wedding I produced this past Saturday, and if I do say so myself, it was absolutely spectacular! I don't know if it was the full moon or what, but the decor was out of this world, the bride was stunning and sweet (totally one of the good ones), the food... OMG... the food was absolutely incredible (and that cake... holy shit! I had some alone time with the red velvet heaven, and boy was I a happy camper!), but there was one little annoying aspect that only two people knew about; the cranky old man, and me.

If you've read through my educationally bitchy tales, I am hoping that you have come to realize that I am actually, "Addicted to Yes", and that I am a pleaser by nature. But, there is only so much I can do once the sun goes down and a Kosher meal is required. As addicted to yes as I am, there are just some things that I truly have no control over. And a Kosher meal on a Saturday night after sundown is something that even I cannot provide. And frankly, yelling in my face won't fix the situation, it will just make it worse (for you asshole).

Brideys, we've talked about the very fine line between making huge concessions to please everybody and it still being your wedding, however it is important that you inquire with the more well known religious guests (particularly the very pious folks) if they will require a special meal. Because this is something that can be extremely hard to fix on game day. Oftentimes, most people will make you aware ahead of time if they need a gluten free meal, have a shellfish allergy, etc., but as a courtesy to the super religious guests, do yourself a favor and ask around. 

In the end, this amazing venue had a FROZEN, wrapped, Kosher meal, and although I bet it tasted like shit, the gentleman was able to stay at the wedding and break bread with the newly married bride and groom. The lesson here? Ask questions! I mean, what can I say? The stars happened to be aligned this time! He got his meal and the happy couple didn't know about the problem, but most of the time a situation like this won't end this well. And do you really want a cranky old man ruining your day?

This is Where My Head is at Today

I'm Not Going to Say "I Told You So"