Today, I've decided to pick up from where I left off last week… In case you missed my post last Tuesday, I wrote Five BASIC Ways to be The Best Bride Ever! Let's focus on # 4… You know the whole wedding day countdown? The “63 Days Until I’m Mrs. Whogivesafuck” post on FaceBook? Don't get me wrong, some of you need a countdown so that it prompts you to remember to get off your ass and get the shit done for your wedding which has been on your “to do” list for too long. But, for you cray cray brideys (and you know who you are), a wedding day countdown can be your own personal hell. You log into your account on The Knot, and you see that you have 68 days until your wedding, sorry, ONLY 68 days until your wedding, and you break out into a cold sweat, and then proceed to torture the rest of us; namely your vendors.
Outside of constantly seeing wedding countdown shit all over FaceBook, I happen to be working with a bride who EVERY TIME we talk (and that's quite a bit), she tells me how many days there are until the wedding. EVERY FUCKING TIME! I mean, it’s all I can do not to dropkick her ass. Seriously, when she breaks out into the whole number of days, hours, and minutes until her wedding, I reach for the Xanax. And, it's not for her, it's for ME! NOT because I am stressed; this is my job, bridey, I got this, but because I need to calm my body so that I don’t pound this chick!
Bridey, of course you should be aware of how much time you have until your wedding! But, knowing how long you have until your wedding should excite you, not stress you to the point of panic. Because panic makes you say and do shit that isn’t logical. It makes you call your vendors and be curt and bitchy. It makes you say things that aren’t nice. And what do I always say about planning your wedding? BE NICE! You’ll get so much more out of your planning if you are NICE to the people you hired to make it go smoothly. Right? I mean it’s such a simple concept.
So, when you use adjectives like “heinous”, “revolting” and “nasty” to describe the sample your florist has put together, because there are only 68 days until your wedding and you are SO STRESSED, it makes me want to crawl under that “hideous” sample table, rock back and forth and hug myself. I feel responsible. I introduced you to my favorite florist, and now you’re treating her like your servant. Seriously, can I get an “OYE VEY”!!! For real... WHAT the fuck? Who do you think you are?!
So bridey, when you see that you only have X amount of days until your wedding, please get in touch with all of the good that your wedding day will bring. You know… Like how you’re marrying the love of your life, or how all of your family and friends from all phases of your life will be under one roof at the same, and that your wedding is a celebration!!!! Got it? ENOUGH with the countdown!
Image via 1weddingsource