Allow me to set the scene for you... You're at some luxury car dealership signing all of the paperwork, swiping your card for the deposit and soon your fancy ass will be gallivanting around in a FAB new car! You are totally in love with it, and you can't wait to drive off of the lot and show your friends! Anyway, fast forward about six or seven months... Suddenly you decide that you really should have gone with the package which included the navigation and the sunroof, so you dial the dude who sold you the car to initiate what you thought would be some friendly conversation.
Bridey: "Hi Dude, it's Bridey Macpherson, and I've decided that I really need to have the nav system and sunroof.
Dude: "Hi Bridey. Allow me to look into that for you."
Bridey: "What do you mean, 'look into that'?"
Dude: "Well, I know that adding a sunroof is about $700.00, and that the addition of the nav can run you about $2,000.00, but let me check with the service department and get back to you." (Clearly, I am making up these numbers!!)
Bridey: "I don't understand. I bought a car from you. I gave you my business. Surely there must be something you can do for me. I was really hoping that you could just make it happen for me."
Dude: "Sorry Bridey, but you've already paid your deposit and drove off of my lot six months ago. If I didn't sell the car to you, I'd have sold it to somebody else."
Bridey: "So, you won't do anything to help me?"
NOOOOOOO... He won't!! Because does this line of conversation seem logical to you? I mean... Would you EVER try this stunt (and expect it to work) with the dude from the car dealership? No, you wouldn't... Well, then, please don't try it with the peeps at your wedding venue. Because we are all way too nice to call you fucking crazy and ignorant (to your face), even if you are just that, a crazy and ignorant bride. Here's the actual conversation between a bride-to-be, and her friendly wedding coordinator:
Bridey: "Hi wedding coordinator (WC), I've decided that I really need to give my guests a third entrée option. Let's add the salmon into the equation. What's the exact verbiage again? My invitations are going out next week, and I want to be sure it's correct."
WC: "Bridey, I'll email you the appropriate verbiage and I'll check with the chef and get back to you with the per person pricing for the additional entrée."
Bridey: "What do you mean, WC? I don't understand... Why would there be an additional cost?"
WC: "Well, if you are looking to provide your guests a third option, you are asking that the chef prepare three separate meals, and there's an additional charge."
Bridey: "WC, I don't know if you realize this, but we are giving your establishment a lot of business. We are practically taking over for the weekend. I really think you need to make it happen for me."
WC: "If it were up to me, I absolutely would make it happen for you, but there is only so much I can do considering that your wedding is during one of the busiest times for the property."
REALLY? I've gone through this a million times... Bridey, why on earth do you think that anybody needs to "make something happen" for you simply because you chose to give them your business? REALITY CHECK... What do you think would happen if you walked into Nordstrom and told the sales associate that because you bought expensive shoes in their store a month ago, they should just give you some sunglasses? Sounds completely ludicrous, right? Well, that's essentially what you are asking of your wedding coordinator except for some reason, it only seems ludicrous when she CAN'T "make it happen".
Bridey, if providing your guests with three entrée selections is important to you, fine. But, this is the kind of thing that must be negotiated (if it's not included) BEFORE you sign the contract. Then, if the sales person can "make it happen" for you, then they will. But, if it is the busiest time of the year for this establishment, they might just tell you "too bad" because another bride will pay the same money and have far less demands...
Image via From up North