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    Monday
    Sep172012

    Let's Avoid the "Concession" Stand

    As I continue to nurse myself back to health after a weekend filled with way too much "nice", too much bullshit, and shoes that were a bit too high, I can't help but wonder how the fuck I got here. Actually, it's more like how the fuck YOU got here. Because last time I checked it was supposed to be your wedding... And considering all of the concessions that were made (against my best advice), I feel like we lost part of you simply by pleasing everybody else.

    It makes me sad. It really does because you, bridey, are one of the good ones; you are one of the nice ones; you are the reminder that every wedding planner needs so that we can continue to keep working with the not-so-nice, crazy ones. It should have been about you and your fiancé, but after this weekend, I have to ask a simple question..."WHY?" Because although the wedding was "just amazing", and "everybody had a great time", I think it's fair to say that you would have done a few things differently. Because as much as I like you, and I liked working with you, here's the short list some shit I would have changed:

    1. You shoulda had the lobster salad. Seriously... Listen, I totally understand that a few "important people" are allergic to shellfish, but that fact is, you and the hus love it, and skipping that amazing salad was a mistake. All we had to do is provide a substitution for those guests allergic to the treif (sorry, it is Rosh Hashana, so this is BB showing some respect), let the kitchen/venue know where said guest is sitting, and voilà everybody can enjoy a great first course.

    I mean, c'mon brideys, I am so sick of catering to every single allergy, or gluten intolerance, or whatever other issue somebody might have... Seriously, I GET IT. And I certainly don't want to get anybody sick or even worse, but communication is the simple fix. Your menu card will explain the MENU! And the people who have food allergies or whatever, KNOW that they are allergic or can't eat gluten, and it is up to THEM to inquire about the ingredients as they do every single day of their lives. Seriously, if we continue to cater to every single allergy or issue in the room, all we'd be left serving is fucking bread and water! UGH!

    2. Remember that post I wrote called "Fuck Off"? Well, we could have used a little bit of that this weekend. Did you really the groom's sister to sing during her toast? You knew she was going to do it, and you know what? It was fucking awkward. I'm sorry, but I told you it would be... I mean, it was so bad, that I had to leave the room because I was embarrassed. I was embarrassed for her, and for everybody witnessing it... And you had the power to put a stop to it before it even began, and you didn't. Maybe the vendor who filmed your wedding can edit her out on your copy...

    3. Your makeup was terrible. I know that I sound like a caddy bitch, but really? It's your wedding, not the high school prom, and unfortunately there's nothing your photographer can do that will take the "whore" out of the bride in those pictures. I'm sorry that your friend does awful makeup. I'm sorry that you knew it (enough to talk to me about it), and still decided to go with her because you're too nice. Where were your balls? 

    Anyway, I could go on and on, but she might figure BB out so I better stop (plus, am on my second G+T and you know how that goes with the truth...). Brideys, no matter what you take from this, please just do three things for me: Always trust your gut... Use your balls... Tell 'em to Fuck off!

    Got it?

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    Reader Comments (17)

    Everything i/we decide for our wedding my mum doesnt agree with and makes her opnion heard; At the start i used to take it to heart and was changing things. Now i let her know i hear her but its our day and we're doing it or i simply just ignore the coments lol.

    September 17, 2012 | Unregistered Commentercas

    Hey Cas,

    That's a smart move! Good for you for even listening to her! HA! But in all seriousness, it's hard to ignore all of the "noise", but if you don't then it stops being about the two of you and your wedding. And then, what's the point, right?

    Thanks for your comment! Continue to stay strong!!

    XO,
    BB

    September 17, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterBitchless Bride

    I am so sick of allergies and every other "ism" that people come up with when they attend a wedding. I am a wedding planner and you are wasting my time using me as a waiter with this stuff. Just like you BB I don't want anyone getting sick or needing a hospital but at the same time there comes a point when people must take responsibility for themselves, especially when it comes down to ones own health.

    September 17, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterWedding Planner Marnie

    Hey WPM,

    It's like you took the words right out of my mouth!! I feel the same way! In fact, I could have written an entire post about allergies, (fake allergies), gluten free, dairy free, etc.... SERIOUSLY? How do people function in life? And for the record, I do want to state that I get it, but holy shit people, take some responsibility for yourselves because the bride should be able to eat fucking lobster salad on her wedding day.

    Okay... I feel better...

    Thanks for your comment Marnie!

    XO,
    BB

    September 17, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterBitchless Bride

    OH BB!! I must once again say, I WISH YOU WERE MY WEDDING PLANNER!! Sad to say this, but I am def one of these please everyone else first type of bride! But here lately, I have grown some balls, small balls but no less they're balls! So! thanks for your awesome blog, it has advised me in many ways, and I thank you! :) xoxo

    September 17, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterPattie

    Hey Pattie!

    I wish I could babe! Although, I must say, it sounds like you're doing well all by yourself (with a little help from the blog :-D)!

    Small balls are still balls my friend. Just gotta know how to use them... Plus, sometimes big balls just get in the way.

    Thank you for your comment and blog love!

    XO,
    BB

    September 17, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterBitchless Bride

    Bahaha! I'm sorry but We didn't even give people an option on the menu. We served family style and hopefully everyone got enough to eat. At the bottom of my response cards it said, "Dinner will be served family style so there is no need to choose your dinner now! If you have a special food allergy let the server know when you sit down." Worked like a charm.

    September 17, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterwyngrrrl

    This past year I have seen two Fathers come into the store and force...and I do mean force. The bride and groom to change the tuxedo styles for the wedding party because they did not like it.

    One of these asses, made them change the styles to the same thing he owned. This way he did not have to pay to rent a tux! The young groom was petrified when the soon to be father-in-law drove him to my store.

    Brides and Grooms need to stand up to these folks its their wedding not the guests or parents.

    Tuxedo Mask
    Defender of Formal Fashion

    September 17, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterTuxedo Mask

    Hey Wyngrrrl & TM,

    Wyngrrl, I love it! You see, you allowed your guests to behave as adults. If you can't eat something, you don't or you inquire as to the ingredients. SIMPLE AS THAT!

    TM, what the fuck? It's amazing that some people survive their horrible parents. Sad that you have to have a license to drive, but not to have babies...

    Anyway, getting a bit too deep consider the amount of wine I've had...

    Thanks for your comments!

    XO,
    BB

    September 17, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterBitchless Bride

    my mum seems like a saint now lol

    September 18, 2012 | Unregistered Commentercas

    you are such a bitch. I dont know why pattie or anybody for that matter would want you as their planner. you are just mean spirited and bitter.

    September 18, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterBitchy "Bridey"

    Hey Bitchy Bridey...she's not 'bitter & mean spirited' she's just sick of thick as shit, dimwitted, twuntfucks...who coo & smile when in fact they're neutered mad as batshit bints who need a kick up their perfectly peachy arses for their bad behaviour....now run along & get a sense of humour sweetie...

    September 18, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterEvenbitchier brides supplier

    Evenbitchier brides supplier, I think i just peed my pants i laughed so hard....As for you Bitchy Bridey Go knock back some gin and a few Xanax and go to your happy place, if you have one!! Seriously, you need a reality check!! Us vendors are fed up of dealing with Brides who don't know their ass from their elbow!!

    Stay fabulous xo

    September 18, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterBecca

    Hmmm... I've been thinking about how to respond to you, Bitchy Bride, and I actually think I'm going to hold my tongue... A few great supporters of the blog have answered for me, so read the two comments below yours, and suck it.

    THANK YOU Evenbitchier brides supplier and Becca for your comments!

    XO,
    BB

    September 18, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterBitchless Bride

    Bitchy Bride,

    I would love to have a kickass accomplished wedding planner who has enough backbone and balls for the both of us!! I think any bride who has the privilege to have BB as a wedding planner is incredibly lucky! I cannot afford one and I would love to have someone looking out for me and my grooms bet interest and someone who is willing to be the bitch! So take your piss poor attitude and shove it! You're a bitch, and you need to find a god dang sense of humor!

    September 18, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterPattie

    Ahhh I wish I'd seen this before I got married. How do you deal with "too many aunties in the kitchen?" Possible guest post *wink wink*?

    November 1, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterRuby

    Hey Ruby!

    HA! Oh the aunties... Honestly, I usually ask the bride which auntie matters most (if at all). I also try to utilize the MOH to help buffer the group from the bride... Sorry you didn't see this before your wedding!!

    Thanks for the comment!

    XO,
    BB

    November 1, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterBitchless Bride

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