Plea for help!
I had a pretty bad experience with our officiant at our wedding...
We had spoken to him on the phone and felt really good about him, so we went ahead and booked. At that point, he sent us their "suggested ceremonies", none of which we liked at all. His "most popular" one was this weird thing about the 5 needs of men (a wife who puts out, always acts like she's into it, keeps the house nice and "wears her hair in a style that is pleasing to him") and the 5 needs of women (I can't remember any but that she wanted to be financially provided for and get cuddles... seriously).
After seeing that, we decided we'd probably do better to try and draft our own ceremony and ask him to follow it- he said that was totally cool, and actually complimented the ceremony when I first sent it via email as well as 2 weeks before the wedding when we did our sit down planning meeting. We went over the ceremony, he asked us to add some things, cut some things and allow him to improv specific parts, all of which we agreed to. We felt really good about everything when we left.
However, the day of the wedding it felt like he hadn't looked at our ceremony again after that meeting. He messed up the name of one of my dead grandfathers (my grandmother was obviously pretty upset), included parts of the ceremony he'd wanted us to cut, and in general seemed very uncomfortable and lost (lots of awkward pauses and "umm"s). I'd made a point of explaining that I would be keeping my name and didn't want to be announced as Mr. and Mrs. X.