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    Entries in Perspective (8)


    The Truth Hurts Tuesday ~ Retrospective Perspective

    Bridey, have you ever looked back at certain moments in your life and uttered, “OMG in retrospect, if I could go back, I’d do it all differently…” Seriously, who hasn’t, right? I mean, there are SEVERAL instances in my life which have me uttering, “Holy crap, what the fuck was I thinking?!” CRINGE! The reason I am bringing this up is because I’d hate for you to look back on your wedding and ask yourself, “How come I was such a bitch during my wedding planning?”

    The reality? How you choose to behave during your wedding planning will be part of your wedding memories. And do you really want those memories marked with such aggravation and bitchiness? Trust me, your vendors will get over it and forget about you after the wedding. But, your behavior is something that you can’t take back, and if you were a total bitch during your planning, I'd be willing to be that down the road, you’ll wish you weren’t.

    Rather than preach to you about how you’ll regret your bad behavior, blah blah blah, let’s try to figure out what has you so worked up, and what we can do about it.

    · Is it the money? I mean, let’s be honest, you’re probably spending more for one day than you will ever spend in your life. But, bridey, it’s important to separate the money from the emotion. Period. If things get messed up, sorry… WHEN things get messed up, you’ll deal with it and you’ll still get married. Your life won't be ruined, okay? So, don’t sweat the small stuff.

    · Is it your in-laws? Fiancé? Both? Well then talk about it! For God’s sake, if you don’t communicate NOW, then what does this say about your marriage; your future; the rest of your life? If this is a glimpse into your future, then obviously you are freaked out. But, bridey, if that’s the case, then you need to talk about it. And go straight to the source(s) because taking it out on everybody else is not helping, it’s hurting. Don’t pussyfoot around either. Be blunt. Be bold. Be bitchless.

    · Is it nerves? Are you worried that you don’t know how to do this? That your wedding will suck? Well, settle down. Nobody expects perfection. In fact, most of your guests don’t even want to go to your wedding. True story. So, get over it. Do yoga, exercise, take Xanax, have some wine and get down and dirty with your man. I mean, not all on the same day or time, but…

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    The Truth Hurts Tuesday ~ Sometimes, Even BB Needs a Little Perspective

    I'm not going to lie, sometimes, I (too) get so caught up in the wedding planning process that every now and then, I require a much needed reminder not only about the significance behind the event, but the reason I was hired to help plan the wedding. I have to separate myself from the beautiful design, an excited bride and overwhelming desire to make each and every detail sparkle and get myself centered; get my shit together. Get some PERSPECTIVE! Why? Well, even though it's not my wedding, in a similar fashion to the how the bride oftentimes finds herself miles away from where she started (be it from a budget standpoint, design aesthetic, etc.), occasionally, so do I. And it's super important that at least one of us remembers what the hell we're doing all of this amazing preparation for... a union of two people who want the world to witness their love, and commitment to each other. Because it's more than just a fucking party; it's a celebration; it's a public promise; it's the beginning of a whole new life. Soooo... as excited as we both get during the planning, I must focus and not to lose sight of the big picture.

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    The Truth Hurts Tuesday ~ Is This Going to Matter in a Year?

    After a busy weekend filled with an amazingly beautiful wedding, tons of family dynamics, and plenty of booze, I wanted to share another dose of perspective with you, bridey. The only way I can reasonably get my point across is by quoting the Rolling Stones; a line I can clearly hear my father singing to me in my early days... "You can't always get what you want, but if you try sometimes, you get what you need." Now that we're all going to be singing that for the rest of the day... Brideys, this is an important lesson. I mean it, please try to remember this phrase as you are working hard making the arrangements for your weddings. Don't let something you THINK you need steal your thunder. Don't let little disappointments capture your mojo. And if you find these little things piling up, then ask yourself this, "Is this going to matter in a year?" Will I give a shit about this particular detail a year from now?

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    Happy Bridey, Happy Wedding (Planning)

    Good morning brideys… I must admit I had to take some time off this weekend. I just needed a break. So, I forced myself to go MIA on Twitter, FaceBook and even Pinterest (I know! Can you believe it?). Because sometimes I just need to completely disconnect... And all I really wanted to do this weekend is play all by myself. It’s strange; sometimes you even need a break from the things you love. Like really love, like the way I love everything about Bitchless Bride. And admittedly, there are even some days that I need a break from my reality, my marriage and basically all responsibility. That’s not to say that I go crazy, cheat on my husband or steal shit, but when I feel this way, it’s important to focus on something that it’s important to me. And this weekend it was shopping, reading, catching up with an old friend and working out.

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    In Sickness and in Health... Before the Wedding

    {Photograph via Jennifer Brotchie Photography}

    So, remember that freebie I mentioned a while back in my "Listen Up" post? You know, the wedding I am planning for free because the bride and groom are my friends? Well, it is coming up this weekend and I could not be more thrilled for several reasons, but most of all because the groom is healthy. The groom is alive, and not in pain. And for that, all of our hard work feels absolutely incredible. This truly is a celebration not only for the union of two people who love each other, but for two people who have already been through sickness and health together. Not to mention a groom that survived a major surgical operation with flying colors, and loves to show off the scars. 

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