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    Entries in vendors (21)

    Tuesday
    Dec232014

    The Truth Hurts Tuesday ~ Designing My Dream Bride

    The other day, a friend of mine asked me who my dream bride would be. Huh? Of course, I immediately asked if she was serious or if she was fucking with me. She assured me that she was dead serious, and then said, "if you could design your dream bride, what would "she" be like?" Oooooooo.... This was getting interesting! Right? If nothing else, it certainly got me thinking... What DOES my dream bride look like? And, with Christmas just a few days away, and millions impending proposals and engagements on the horizon, the timing of her question seemed appropriate. Just think... If even just 90% of you, brideys, read this post right after your engagement, then my job is done! So, here it goes... Bitchless Bride's Dream Bride:

    1. My dream bride would remember who she was before she got engaged! Kinda the whole point of my blog, right? Just because you're engaged, doesn't give you the right to be a bitch. Remember, what you put out there is what you'll get back. So, bridey, if you're nice to people (vendors, bridesmaids, etc.), then they will be nice to you. They will do nice things for you. They will go out of their way for you. However, if you are a total bitch, then you'll get the bare minimum from those around you. Seriously, why would your bridesmaids go out of their way for you if they are beginning to hate you? Same goes for your vendors. If you treat them like shit, why should they go above and beyond? Right? Consider this a fact.

    2. My dream bride would remember WHY she wanted to get married in the first place... Um, the dude or the chick your want to spend the rest of your life with... Your sig other! PERSPECTIVE!! See the girl in the picture? She's happy! And, you should be too! You're marrying the love of your life!! (And if you're not, then that's a whole other blog post!)

    Bridey, I eloped, and I know that eloping isn't for everybody, but all I could think of at the time was that I loved my hus, and we had a shitload of family dynamics that could have presented themselves at the worst possible time. But, no matter what? I wanted to be with the dude. So, even if we had stuck to the plan and had a big wedding, all I wanted was him...

    3. My dream bride would treat people with respect (friends, family, vendors). Piggybacking off of number one... Don't be a bitch. Treat people with respect. It's so simple and basic (human decency), and yet oftentimes it gets lost when the wedding planning gets stressful or emotions become extreme. Just remember to breathe, bridey, and be nice. It will be well worth it!

    4. My dream bride would trust me (and all of the other professionals she hired) unequivocally. She would trust that if we are working together, that I know what I am doing, and let me do it. Don't get in my way. Don't think that because your maid of honor (MOH) got married a month ago that we should listen to her (or whothefuckever). Just let me take your dream, and run with it (with established boundaries, of course)!

    5. My dream bride would skip the micromanaging bullshit. Again, you have to trust me, and let me present you with the applicable details. Bridey, your vendors are not going to share the nitty gritty with you, and honestly, you don't want to know all of the behind the scenes shit that you are missing. Just back off,

    Click to read more ...

    Tuesday
    Nov112014

    The Truth Hurts Tuesday ~ Trust the Process... When Time is Not of the Essence

    Sooo... I gotta say, I really lucked out this weekend. I worked with awesome clients who not only trusted me unequivocally, but also took my advice, hired vendors in my network and then let me do what I do best... Plan their event (and got the hell out of my way so I COULD do my job)! Because that is what I do best, brideys. Plan. And when you're in my face bossing me around and getting involved without fully understanding the nature of the beast (that is your event), you're only hurting yourself. Why? Well, let me explain.

    Yesterday morning, over a delicious boozy brunch, I was chatting with a vendor friend of mine who wasn't as lucky as I was with her bride from the weekend. Her client just couldn't let go. This chick micromanaged every single detail to the point of nearly ruining her wedding for the sake of being on time. Really? I'm sorry, but that's fucked up. I've said it a million times, bridey. It's not about the time things happen, it's about the order and flow in which they take place. The order of events will always trump the time they take place.

    Click to read more ...

    Tuesday
    Oct282014

    The Truth Hurts Tuesday ~ Tipping... Honestly? It's Always Expected and Always Appreciated

    As I come off of my high from the weekend filled with super successful events, I am even more elated because this girl is on her way to go get herself some absolutely not needed new shoes. Why? Well, because first of all, I am awesome, but more importantly because I got a fat tip from one of my clients. Did I expect it? Sure did. But, even though I expected a tip doesn't always mean that'll I receive one, regardless of how much my client "loves me, and couldn't get through it without me." Call me an asshole, but it's true. I expected and this time I received. 

    Sounds terrible, right? Yeah, I know it does, but I also know that no matter how much time and energy I put into planning every wedding and event, I don't get paid nearly enough. None of your wedding vendors do, bridey. Because all of us are focused on staying competitive (with each other), even if it means taking a hit financially. And quite frankly, usually the breakdown in hours spent ensuring your wedding day is going to be fucking sensational, is about that of an hourly employee at McDonald's. Actually, I bet in some cases, they make more dough then we do. Because, never mind how much we charge, nine times out of ten you're always going to get more than you paid for... It's just the nature of the the industry. We say "yes" a hell of a lot more than any other industry.

    Bridey, I have written quite a bit about tipping your wedding vendors, and have also had guest bloggers write about tipping your wedding vendors. Bottom line? TIP YOUR FUCKING WEDDING VENDORS.

    Click to read more ...

    Tuesday
    Oct212014

    The Truth Hurts Tuesday ~ Don't Go Breaking Our Hearts or Busting Our Balls

    This post is tough because I TOTALLY get it. I really do. I get it because I deal with it EVERY.FUCKING.DAY. And, I'm telling you that I get it before I even explain what the hell "it" is JUST to cover my ass... So, here it goes. Bridey, shit is going to change. Your wedding plans are going to change. Your guest list will go up and down eighteen fucking times based on family dynamics or lack of guest list control (usually because of your mom BTW...). Your flowers will change a bazillion times based on personal preference, availability and design. Your wedding dress will be taken in and out or scraped completely, but the most irritating, never ending change that for some reason is expected to be "no big deal"? Guess... Duh, look up!

    The menu. Bridey, there comes a point when it is up to you to get your shit together, and simply be done with your menu. The most annoying thing in the whole wide world is a bride who continually changes her menu all the way down to the week before her wedding. Be it the passed hors d'oeuvres, stations during the cocktail hour or even the damn salad before entree, it's coo coo. Many chefs, venues and caterers will try to accommodate (particularly if your numbers go UP), but there comes a time when it's just not okay to keep changing your fucking mind. When you're a week away from your wedding, all anybody in "the industry" cares about is the number of guests and how many of each...

    So you saw "something really cool" at an event you were at last week. Forget about it. Somebody suggested "that you ought to do blah, blah, blah..." FORGET ABOUT IT! Seriously, don't go busting balls at the venue or with your caterer because now that stupid Philly cheese steak egg roll is "a must".

    Click to read more ...

    Tuesday
    Jul082014

    The Truth Hurts Tuesday ~ All Weddings Are Not Created Equal – Comparison is the Thief of Joy

    Bridey, when it comes to what your vendors are going to provide for you, avoid comparing what you heard your vendors did for your best friend, sort of friend, acquaintance or somebody that you know. Because each circumstance is different... Perhaps the caterer threw in an additional passed hors d’oeuvre during cocktail hour for your friend because they received a shitload of short rib that they needed to unload or else it would go bad. Or maybe the florist your acquaintance used was late paying her rent for the very expensive studio she resides in and lowered her pricing so that she would win the business. Your friend got a free cheese display? Perhaps the catering manager at the venue comped the damn display because your friend is awesome and she simply wanted to throw her a bone. Or, you know what? Maybe, they’re all lying or embellishing the truth. Whaaaa? You don’t think that you girls are competing just a bit? So be happy with what you got because as Theodore Roosevelt said, "Comparison is the Thief of Joy".

    Whatever the case may be, bridey, I just can’t listen to it anymore! Remember when you told your mom that the whole class failed that stupid fucking geometry test and her retort was that, ahem (imagine your best mom voice), “I don’t care about the rest of the class, I care about you.” UGH! But, you totally remember, don’t you? Well, that is essentially what I am saying to you. When you approach your vendors with deals that they may or may not have made with your peers, it does nothing but piss them off in the same way it pissed off your mother. Because each circumstance is different!!! They are focused on what they are providing to you. And all weddings are not created equal! And frankly, all brides are not created equal. And... you guessed it! Not all "deals" are created equal!

    Bridey, if you want a freebie, the worst possible way you can go about asking for it is to say that of your friend, or whomever, got a deal and therefore you want one too. Seriously? That’s just annoying. Be straightforward. Be nice. Show some respect for the vendor with whom you are working, and leave everybody else out of the equation. If something is out of your budget, tell them, and if they are in a position to discount it or offer it to you complimentary, so be it, but let it be their decision. No matter what, if you have been a delight to work with thus far, anything is possible. I told Elizabeth Vargas that when we sat down for a chat. Basically, we (vendors) want to go above and beyond for those clients who treat us with respect. 

    Got it? 

    Good.

    Image via France Dress