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    Entries in wedding day (12)

    Tuesday
    Jun172014

    The Truth Hurts Tuesday ~ Five Ways to Avoid Being a Micromanager on Your Wedding Day

    Bridey, I can handle a lot of things, but the one thing I cannot stand is to be micromanaged. Period. So, please don’t micromanage me. And please don’t micromanage your vendors. The funny thing is that I’m not talking about now; the wedding planning process. I’m talking about on your wedding day. Seriously, don’t you have enough on your mind? Like, oh, I don’t know… your wedding vows, your reception and how basically every single person you love will be in the same room at the same time… That’s a big deal, bridey. HUGE actually, and I hate to say it, but that will most likely only happen one other time in your life. Yeah, I’ll let you figure that one out yourself.

    As I was saying, this is our job. We, your vendors, do this most every weekend throughout the year (more or less), and hopefully you will only do this once. And when you take a step back, who has more experience? I’ll give you a hint, it ain’t you babe! So, please, just enjoy your wedding day because not only do you deserve to be utterly happy, but we have worked incredibly hard making it happen for you.

    Look, I know that it’s easier said than done, so I thought I would give you a few pointers on how to prevent your bridey ass from turning into a micromanager on your wedding day:

    1. I know this is simple, but just resist the urge to micromanage. Every time you feel it bubbling up, think about the big picture and all of the professionals you have hired to do their jobs. Bridey, you are not on the clock today. You should literally just sit there looking pretty and enjoying yourself.

    2. Remember how I said that you hired professionals? Well bridey, give yourself a round of applause because there is a reason why you hired WHO you hired, right? So let go of all your Type A mannerisms and allow said professionals to do the job you hired them to do.

    3. On that note, let them (your vendors) do their job their way. Perhaps you’ve dabbled in photography or were an MC in college. That’s great, but please don’t begin suggesting amazing shots that your photographer just “has to take” or making turntable recommendations to your DJ. They’ll figure it out! They always do. Bridey, unless there is something specific that you forgot to communicate to one of your vendors or the venue prior to your wedding, ease off and just relax!

    Click to read more ...

    Tuesday
    Jun102014

    The Truth Hurts Tuesday ~ I'm Not Going to Say, "I TOLD YOU SO!!!!"

    Yeah, I'm feeling kinda ranty today. Honestly, I'm fucking exhausted. I'm so tired of being the shrink, mediator, personal assistant, and hand holder. This wedding season has been awesome and brutal all at the same time! Seriously, I feel completely bipolar because one day, I am absolutely elated; lovin' life and my clients, and the next, I am down in the dumps wishing I had a chosen to do something else with my life. Something that didn't require so much brain power; something where my "product" wasn't dependant on people and their ever-changing ideas and opinions.

    This wedding season, I've had some truly amazing clients who really understand that there is life beyond their wedding day, and then I've also had some clients who are so self absorbed and seem to have some serious issues with sharing. That's an odd thing for me to say, huh? I guess it is... Why don't I explain with a story...

    Recently, I worked with a client who was absolutely OBSESSED with the fact that her gorgeous and extremely popular venue had the nerve to have another event booked in their ballrom prior to her big day. Outrageous, right? I mean, how could they have the audacity to maximize their profit on a busy Saturday in June? Yeah... hoping you're picking up on my sarcasm... Anyway, almost every single conversation we had either started with or ended with a diatribe, asking me if "I could believe that they had another party ending so close to the beginning of her wedding." Perhaps I am somewhat immune to a tight turn (meaning that the venue and vendors have a short period of time to flip an event space from one party to the next), but a two hour window is nothing; easy peasy. In fact, there are plenty of us (vendors, wedding planners, etc.) who have turned a room in an hour! But, no matter how hard I tried to explain this to my client, she would not HEAR me. And goddamn if I wasn't annoyed.

    Click to read more ...

    Tuesday
    Apr082014

    The Truth Hurts Tuesday ~ How to Get Your Mom to Stop Texting on Your Wedding Day! Whaaaa? 

    Every now and then, I get an email from a distraught bride fretting over such a universal topic, that I feel like I would be missing out on an opportunity to educate all of you brideys, so today I am sharing it on Bitchless Bride. Below, you will see an email which I received from "Bridget" regarding her mother's obsession with her iPhone. Bridget is asking for some advice on how to handle her MOB's addiction with said phone, and wants to be sure that mama is present, both physically and mentally, for the big day. 

    I am getting married in about six weeks. While my mother and I don't have the perfect relationship, she has been phenomenal through the planning process. She has kept her personal opinions to herself and aimed to give my fiance and I the wedding we desire. She has been key to planning the event from 1,500 miles away.

    The problem? My mother is addicted to her iPhone. She is constantly texting, emailing, Facebooking and often during very important times. Much of this is because she runs her own business and doesn't have normal hours (I am sure you can relate), but she has yet to set boundaries. For instance, when I come home to visit, she is often on her phone during family dinner and movie night. I am afraid my wedding will be a victim of her addiction too.

    I am very worried that my mom will miss a momentous event in her and my life because she is so concerned with taking pictures she can text or post to Facebook. She has worked very hard and waited a long time (8 years of us dating) for this day and I want her to be fully present. I know I can't tell her what to do, not that would I consider that, but is there a tactful way to let her know I would like her to be engaged in the day and not so concerned with her virtual presence?

    Thanks,

    Bridget

    Dear Bridget,

    My very first thought, is that while it would be inapprorate to tell her what do to, you certainly CAN tell her how you feel. You don't have to be nasty about it, bridey, but you should definitely have a candid conversation about how you are feeling.

    Click to read more ...

    Tuesday
    Jan212014

    The Truth Hurts Tuesday ~ I Should Have Been an Attorney

    I'm thinking I should have gone to law school. No really, I should have. I come from a family of attorneys and judges, and going to school for food science and pastry was probably not what my folks had in mind for me. Although, they always supported my originality (particularly around food... I used to dye my hair with fucking Kool-Aid! Oh, and it worked!), I would be making piles and piles more dough, and then I would feel more comfortable charging by the hour.

    Some event planners DO charge by the hour, and I am strongly considering changing the way I structure my business and getting on board with the whole charging by the hour thing. Because some of you brideys really take advantage when it comes to air time. If I divided what your wedding is worth to me from a dollars and cents standpoint, by the number of hours spent with you, on your behalf or on the phone with you, I would DEFINITELY be making more money if the clock started running the moment I said, "Hello." Harsh, but true. Would you feel as comfortable pouring your heart and soul out to me or dwelling on some very small stupid detail if you know that each minute was going to cost you $5? I don't think so. I think you would most likely curb the bullshit, get to the point, and move on. Right?

    Yes, I love what I do. Yes, I care about what you think. And, yes, I do like you, bridey. But, sometimes I feel like you need to consider that time is money, and that I am a business; no matter how small or how personalized, I do what I do to make money. Don't you? So, when you keep me on the phone stuck on something that we have discussed over and over again that won't make a fucking difference in the overall scheme of your wedding day, it's all I can do not to reach over and grab the egg timer. I mean it... Go talk it through with your fiance or best friend, because at least they can drink when they are with you, and politely (or maybe not so politely) tell you to stop obsessing over the small shit, and focus on the enormity of what a wedding means.

    Bridey, all I am saying is to please be mindful of your wedding vendors. We are too polite to tell you to shut your mouth, but our time is just as valuable as yours. So, put a sock in it, or I'm gonna break out that egg timer.

    Image via Pokerati

    Tuesday
    Nov262013

    The Truth Hurts Tuesday ~ Don't be a Bitch! Keep Your Consultation Appointments

    Written by The Other Hot Pink Planner

    Dear Brides,

    As vendors we absolutely love scheduling consultations because to us, it means that people interested in our services and we get excited to meet with a new bride and/or groom! Actually, we love them so much that we offer FREE consultations for our clients (just so you know, not every vendor offers a free consultation, and now I can now understand why)... so when we offer FREE consultations, we greatly appreciate that you hold your end of that bargain and make it to your appointment, and on time. If you're not going to make the appointment, with respect for the other party involved (aka, me, your vendor) please call to say you won't be making it (with more than 20 minutes notice).

    You see, many of us don't have a store front (which is how we are affordable to you) therefore we don’t have set hours. This makes it easy for us to schedule and work around YOUR schedule and therefore putting our personal and family time on the back burner. So, please, brides and grooms, if you schedule a vendor consultation... Please don’t just NOT show up! If you found a different vendor for the service, fantastic! We completely understand and are happy for you! But, please respect our time and call to cancel rather than just not show up.

    The truth? It sucks because just like you, we have lives. We have families. But what we don't have? Time to spare! So, be considerate to others, especially your vendors (and your potential vendors). Just because you are a bride doesn't give you the right to be inconsiderate! You're not the only ones in the world getting married. You aren't better than the next bride, and you don't get special treatment because you're getting married! And bare in mind, if you chose to have a no call/no show to a vendor appointment and you happened to really like that vendor's work, don't be surprised if they're now 'booked' for your wedding day.

    (I HAVE to add my two cents... The other side of this equation? Make an appointment with your vendors. Don't just walk into a hotel, florist, DJ, etc. and think that because they are in the service industry, that you will be seen, and immediately. Just like you, your vendors maintain a schedule, and also schedule appointments with other brides. I mean... Would you ever just walk in and expect to see your dentist or doctor? Probably not, because you know that they don't give a shit that you were "just in the area"... So, let's go back to the basics, brideys... PHONE FIRST!!)

    Thank you, 

    The Other Hot Pink Planner*

    *Check out another vent from The Other Hot Pink Planner here

    Image via Become a Top Wedding Planner