Brunch with Bitchless

I'm piloting a wedding planning workshop. First stop? Boston. 

Let me help you plan your wedding, personally. I am hosting a wedding planning workshop filled with kickass advice, jam packed goodie bags and the chance to win some incredible prizes. Come alone, or bring your BFF, mom, mother-in-law (MIL), maid of honor (MOH) or fiancé!! But, just sign up!

Know a bride who could use a dose of BB? Then buy her a ticket! Consider it her engagement gift!

Learn More

Wanna Rock a Bitchless Bride or Bridesmaid T-Shirt?

Bitchless Social
Advertisers
Save on Wedding Favors @ Beau-coup.com Minted Wedding Stationery Shop Blush Box Shop Custom Save the Date Invites> Wedding Save the Date Magnets Personalized Matches
Join Our Mailing List
This form does not yet contain any fields.
    Search
    Bitchless Around the Web

    Read our content on other sites we love:


     

    Bitchless Twitter Feed

    Entries in wedding planner (30)

    Tuesday
    Jun242014

    The Truth Hurts Tuesday ~ A Quick & Dirty Etiquette Refresher for All of You Brides to Be!

    I feel a rant coming on... And maybe it's because I'm on vacation next week and I feel my patience wearing thin or maybe it's because I'm feeling completely burnt out from the craziness of wedding season, but this bridey really pissed me off. Know why? Well, she was a guest at this particular wedding (I knew she'd be there), and not only did she ask me several questions about her own wedding, comparing décor details and whatnot and even a few logistical questions, but she serial texted me décor ideas that she liked for her own wedding or would things she would change, as I was in the midst of running the event. Yeah... Are you fucking kidding me?

    So, my clients obviously knew each other, which is great, but when I'm running the event that I have put my blood, sweat and maybe even a few tears into, get outta my face. Seriously. Bridey, your day will come, and right now, I'm fucking busy making sure this event is flawless and as much as I like you, you don't matter to me right now. You hardly exist. Plus, your wedding isn't for months, and therefore I'm not focused on it as I'm running around checking every last detail for wedding I am orchestrating, TODAY!!!

    Click to read more ...

    Tuesday
    Feb112014

    The Truth Hurts Tuesday ~ It's Time to Trash the Wedding Day Countdown

    Today, I've decided to pick up from where I left off last week… In case you missed my post last Tuesday, I wrote Five BASIC Ways to be The Best Bride Ever! Let's focus on # 4… You know the whole wedding day countdown? The “63 Days Until I’m Mrs. Whogivesafuck” post on FaceBook? Don't get me wrong, some of you need a countdown so that it prompts you to remember to get off your ass and get the shit done for your wedding which has been on your “to do” list for too long. But, for you cray cray brideys (and you know who you are), a wedding day countdown can be your own personal hell. You log into your account on The Knot, and you see that you have 68 days until your wedding, sorry, ONLY 68 days until your wedding, and you break out into a cold sweat, and then proceed to torture the rest of us; namely your vendors.

    Outside of constantly seeing wedding countdown shit all over FaceBook, I happen to be working with a bride who EVERY TIME we talk (and that's quite a bit), she tells me how many days there are until the wedding. EVERY FUCKING TIME! I mean, it’s all I can do not to dropkick her ass. Seriously, when she breaks out into the whole number of days, hours, and minutes until her wedding, I reach for the Xanax. And, it's not for her, it's for ME! NOT because I am stressed; this is my job, bridey, I got this, but because I need to calm my body so that I don’t pound this chick!

    Bridey, of course you should be aware of how much time you have until your wedding! But, knowing how long you have until your wedding should excite you, not stress you to the point of panic. Because panic makes you say and do shit that isn’t logical.

    Click to read more ...

    Wednesday
    Dec042013

    Real Wedding Wednesday ~ A Beautiful Harmony

    I really, really, really love that Melissa and Robert met on eHarmony. I mean, it feels like yesterday, when I first started planning weddings, that people still met in bars... Just kidding (I mean I met my husband in a bar, but we all can't be that lucky now can we?), but seriously? I do remember when meeting online was somewhat of a faux pas. And now, it's totally commonplace. Seriously, today I'm like a walking advertisement for online dating sites! Just read what Melissa had to say about meeting Robert, and the rest of the deets!

    Rachel: "Robert & I met on eHarmony. We actually both remember looking at each other’s profiles. After he saw that I viewed his, he emailed me. We started communicating around Thanksgiving in 2010 and just talked for a few weeks. We went on our first date on 12/11/10 at Cuba Cuba in Denver (Robert is ½ Cuban). We hit it off on our first date and the rest is history!"

    Yeah... Wedding Paper Divas! Truly stunning invitations, don't you think?I know that I shouldn't tell you this, but I am really proud of how my little mash up of photographs turned out. I am a wedding planner, not a web designer, and I'm pretty proud! Just sayin'...So honest. So lovely.Loving the purple!!Such a proud papa!! Melissa is barely holding it together...

    Click to read more ...

    Tuesday
    Nov122013

    The Truth Hurts Tuesday ~ Quit F*cking Around, Bridey

    **Written by The Peeved Planner"

    My Dearest Brides,

    Please understand that we, as wedding planners, love you. If we didn't, then we wouldn't be in this business. I love everything about planning a wedding, seeing the plans come together and the big day, and well, it just makes me smile. 

    I think back to the time when you and I were just starting out… Looking at venues, sending you off to do tastings, picking out flowers, you know, all the fun stuff. I also think about how you stressed me out more than my 4 yr. old. Ya, you deary, you did that to me. 

    Girls (and guys), my job is to narrow down your choices and offer you some that will fit within your budget and style. I offer you a few fab venues out of the 4000 or so that are out there, bakeries that will make the type of cake or desserts you want, hook you up with a bad ass florist, hold your hand while we check out linens, décor and such. Because that’s my job. Basically, it’s my job is to narrow down and weed out the vendors that won’t work for you and offer choices that will, (and have you make a timely decision on which one you like). Did you catch that, bridey? YOU make a timely decision!   

    Deciding three days before your wedding to change your mind? Well, that’s pretty ridiculous. Oh, NOW you want your hair and makeup done by "the girl" you met with more than two months ago? Really? And then, not understanding why she isn't available?? Seriously?? Oh, and your friend, the wanna be florist, who you “trust with your life”, you know, the one who said that she might be able to do your flowers, but instead she bailed? (Not going to say, “I told you so.”) Great. So now, here I am begging any and all of the florists in my network (a week before your wedding) to do your arrangements and not upcharge you for the short notice, simply because you decided that you didn’t need a “real” florist even though I begged and pleaded with you to get one. Bridey, I know the wedding is all about you, but having me, and my vendors scramble at the last minute because you can’t or won’t make a decision is pretty crappy.   

    Here’s another thing, please don’t lie to me! 

    Click to read more ...

    Tuesday
    Oct082013

    The Truth Hurts Tuesday ~ Five Signs You are in Desperate Need of a Wedding Planner

    I had a lovely meeting with a potential client today. This bride was charismatic, bright and pretty awesome actually... But, all I kept thinking during our meeting was that I got to her in the nick of time! Seriously, this bridey was about to go from pretty awesome to pretty cray cray real fucking fast! And the more she spoke, the more I was able to see it... Seriously, I felt like I was watching myself in some horror movie. You know the ones that make you think you are going crazy, but what you are seeing is really happening?! I swear I saw an invisible crack slowly creeping down her body. It started from the top of her skull and was getting bigger and bigger... It's a good thing she found me or else this chick would have CRACKED! And then? Well, this bridey, bitch would be on the loose!

    Sooo, bridey... I starting thinking about the signs when it becomes apparent that you need to hire a planner:

    1. Your husband-to-be threatens divorce before you even walk down the aisle. That would suck, right?!! Bridey, it's okay to admit you need help. For some, wedding planning truly is a second job. My advice? Just don't wait until you're in over your head to do it. Get help sooner rather than later.

    2. When vodka starts becoming your dinner, regularly... We all hit the sauce during stressful times (I'm legit drinking a delicious vodka tonic right now!), and that normal. But, when the sauce starts becoming a food group? Well, then you many have yourself a little bit of a problem. Brideys, I'm allowed to drink because I am busy planning all of your crazy weddings! Like SEVERAL. But, you? Not so much. If you're turning to the sauce or any vice for that matter, then it's time to call in the big dogs. Okay?

    3. Your friends don't want to play with you anymore.... Because you suck...

    Click to read more ...