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    Entries in Wedding Planning (45)

    Tuesday
    Mar242015

    The Truth Hurts Tuesday ~ Bridey, Don't be Mental... 10 Behavioral Characteristics to Avoid While Planning Your Wedding

    The other day, I tweeted that I've been brunching so much that I really think I am subconsciously aspiring to be a "lady who lunches". But, how could I leave all of this? (I say super sarcastically...) Leave all of you? I mean, what would my life be like without you crazy bitch brideys? The truth is, I couldn't leave planning (and know how to function). And, that fact became brutally clear to me during brunch yesterday as I was surrounded by some of my favorite peeps in the whole wide world. Actually, not the whole wide world, but in my world; "the industry". You see, all of us work in hotels or private planning and deal with the craziness of the hospitality culture, the constant need to say "yes", and the brutal hours. But, as we got to talking it became clear to me what I needed to write about today. You! And, your cray cray attitude.

    Bridey, based on the anecdotes and sheer hilarity that took place during brunch, I thought I would give you a few tips on how not to be mental while planning your wedding! So, here it goes...:

    10 Behavioral Characteristics to Avoid While Planning Your Wedding:

    1. Entitlement: Bitch, please... I don't work for you; I am attempting to work with you. I am your vendor. I am the chick busting my ass at a fancy hotel, or country club or I'm a private event planner, photographer, DJ or or or... And all I am trying to do is help you achieve "the dream". So, knock off the bullshit, drop the entitlement, and let me do my job... Without hating you. Trust me, nothing pisses us off more than some bitch who thinks she is better than the rest of the world. You'll get more out of your vendors if you're nice. PERIOD.

    2. Moodiness: Look, we're women... And, I've heard that we tend to get a bit moody when we're stressed. Right? But, as your vendor, I am not your punching bag or your Xanax. And you know what? I can be just as moody as you, bridey, but I have mastered the concept of "faking until I make it". Have you?

    3. Perfectionism: I strive for perfection too (um, I'm what they call super detail oriented), bridey, but I also know when my best is good enough. And, I suggest you start learning how to do the same. It's really amazing, but you can have the "perfect" wedding day, and still have shit go wrong. Seriously, I think every single recently married bride will tell you the same thing. And, I know that with the amount of money you're spending, comes pressure for perfection, but please remember, above everything else, comes the person you are marrying...

    4. Irrationalism: Do I really need to say more? Bridey, when you feel yourself starting to go off of the deep end, go for a walk, workout, get your nails done or whatever... Basically? Take a break and use the time to think things through. I promise, the craziness will pass if you give it chance. But, you gotta give a little.

    5. Procrastination: Procrastination fucks us all up. Your wedding vendors, that is. Bridey, if you procrastinate, then it slows down the entire process for all of your wedding vendors. It's a total domino effect, and it all starts with you. For instance, if you need to make a decision regarding your floral arrangements, do it. Now. If not, you may not get what you want on your wedding day. And, then you put your florist in the position to rush an order or feel as though she is harassing the bride. Not good. (And, not for nothing, but, if you're renting linen, a lot will depend on your arrangements, etc., hence the domino effect...)

    6. Indecisiveness: Indecisiveness can be just as annoying as procrastination. It's like you're procrastinating because you're indecisive, and, that's fucking annoying.

    Click to read more ...

    Tuesday
    Jan202015

    The Truth Hurts Tuesday ~ Five Reasons You, Bridey, Can be a Bitch, Just Like My Cat

    As I was laying in bed last night, my cat, Olivia, was all over me. She was headbutting my face, pawing my shoulder when I wasn't responding quickly enough for her advancements and then completely ignoring me when I was ready to give her my full attention. And then it dawned on me... My cat is just like a few of my clients! Holy shit! These brideys represent some of the best and the worst behavior of my feline. While I'm not suggesting that these girls poop in a box, I am suggesting that every interaction they have is on their terms... Meaning that you, bridey, can be a bitch, just like my 'lil furry beast! Seriously, it was a midnight fucking epiphany! For instance:

    1. Cats are selfish. Right? Pretty much every single thing they do is self-serving. Some of my clients? The EXACT same way! They're selfish. Really, it's incredible how self absorbed and rude a bride can be when she feels a tiny bit ignored or if she feels as though her needs are not being met. Perhaps it more of a self preservation mechanism, but whatever it is, it can be painful.

    The fix? Remember that while your needs are important, bridey, the needs of those around you count too. So, just breathe, and know that people care about you and will take care of you. Just like a cat! No need to panic!

    2. Cats need immediate attention... On their terms. I've had a client get angry that I did not return her a call within an hour of receiving a message. Once I explained that I was in a meeting with a client (who was tying the knot in 48 hours), she simmered down, but... REALLY? 

    The fix? Bridey, you are important to me, and I promise to take care of you. Remember this when I don't respond within 60 minutes. 

    3. Cats ignore you. It's funny, I am about to contradict myself based on what I said in #2, but

    Click to read more ...

    Tuesday
    Dec162014

    The Truth Hurts Tuesday ~ A Sometimes Sweet, Sometimes Snide Jekyll and Hyde Bride

    So, I'm working with this amazing bride. She's sweet, kind and rocks s sense of humor that gives me belly laughs. On the other hand, I'm working with a bride who sometimes makes my skin crawl with each snarky email, short, terse voicemail and cringeworthy verbal diatribes. The crazy thing? It's the same fucking bride! Same chick. True story. And the worst part? In true Jekyll and Hyde fashion, she lacks consistency on a consistent basis. I never know which girl I'm gonna get. It's a brutal, sometimes abusive relationship and I'm sick of it.

    I don't know how her fiancé deals with this shit. 'Cause I'm about to lose my fucking mind. Seriously, if you're going to be a bitch, then be a bitch. And, if you're going to be awesome and funny, then be awesome and funny. But, this Jekyll and Hyde crap? I hate it, and I'm about to go coo coo on her ass. Because frankly, I got rid of this kind bullshit in my life a long time ago. I don't associate with people like this anymore; I'm too old and don't have the patience. Not too mention it's exhausting.

    Click to read more ...

    Tuesday
    Dec022014

    The Truth Hurts Tuesday ~ Wedding Planning... It's Only Temporary, Bridey

    I had brunch with a close friend of mine recently, and this chick? Well, she's pretty fucking KICKASS!! And not because she's the CEO of some company or because she's got her shit together, but because of her perspective, bridey. You know, my favorite word in the whole wide world! PERSPECTIVE!! They say that you never know where your inspiration is going to come from, and let's just say that today's post hit me like a ton of bricks. You see, my kickass friend? Well, she's going through some awful shit these days. I won't get into the gory details, but it seems like all of the craziness is happening to her all at once. You know the saying about how shit happens in 3s? I seriously think this is her fourth or fifth. And instead of wallowing in her sorrow (which I would probably succumb to myself), she just keeps casually uttering, "It's only temporary." Wow. So simple, yet hard to do...

    As a wedding planner, I've watched some pretty cool girls get rocked by their wedding planning simply because planning your wedding and real life are oftentimes a tough mix. But, as I listened to my friend say that, "It's only temporary", it kinda got me thinking about her healthy outlook. Instead of slipping into a dark place and lashing out at her friends and family, everyday she rises above how she feels, and looks forward; something that I think is really hard for all of us to do. How do you fit into this, bridey?

    Well, if you look at planning your wedding as something that is only temporary, adjust your perspective (during the particularly difficult times like dealing with family dynamics and budget constraints) and realize that a year from now, life will most likely be totally different (depending on when you are getting married) then you too should be able to utter the phrase, "It's only temporary." The key? You'll actually have to adjust your thinking and believe in that statement. It won't be easy and it probably won't alleviate the stress and bullshit you are dealing with instantaneously, but it has the power of preventing you from getting in your own way, and rising above...

     

    Click to read more ...

    Tuesday
    Nov182014

    The Truth Hurts Tuesday ~ Five Habits of a Successful Bride

    If you do a little browsing, bridey, you'll find that there is a ton of advice out there on pretty much anything you can plug into Google, Pinterest... you name it. Hell, yesterday I poached two perfect eggs in the microwave (in 75 seconds) because I searched "eggs" while procrastinating on Pinterest! And you know what? My eggs? Fucking awesome! Perfectly poached and delicious! But, when I searched "habits of successful brides" via Google? Nada. Zilch. Zero. Now, obviously I found a TON of articles on brides, weddings, bridesmaids, wedding shows, etc., but nothing that really satisfied my itch. So, what's a girl to do? Write it herself! I mean... I am a professional after all! So, bridey, based on my experience as a planner and recalling several of my "got their shit together brides", here's what I came up with... Ready?

    Five Habits of a Successful Bride:

    1. Become a time management guru. Start outlining "due by" dates. Set yourself up for success. Bridey, I hate to say this, but the second that rock landed on your finger, you became the proud owner of another full time job. And when you start a new job, it's important to begin with a bang! Right? So, take it on like one... Get organized and prove your worth! To yourself!!! Get your shit together, and the rest will fall into place!

    2. Set a realistic budget. Seriously, you wouldn't buy a car or a house that you couldn't afford (because the banks wouldn't let you!), and this shouldn't be any different, bridey. Except this time, there isn't a bank standing in the way of your dream, squashing your credit score and preventing you from moving forward. Right? So proceed with caution. How much do you have to spend on your wedding? What's most important to you? Decor? Flowers? Food? Booze? Figure this piece out first and then work backwards. If food is super important to you, then set a lower budget for flowers and decor. Is music important to you? Then allocate a fair amount to the band/DJ. If you are on a tight budget, then I'm sorry to say, but you can't have it all, so plan accordingly.

    3. Get in touch with your internal noise canceller. Remember, while weddings are a happy time in your life, all of the skeletons and bullshit that you thought was behind you, have a tendancy to rear it's ugly head. Honestly, you need to filter that shit, bridey. Filter out the noise. Filter out the negativity. And if necessary, talk to a therapist. Because, based on my experience, family dynamics are probably the biggest stressor for my clients. And you know what's crazy?

    Click to read more ...