Vendor Vents

Five Things You Don't Know About Your Hotel Event Planner

2013-04-09T08:00:53Z

Written by "Your Friendly Hotel Event Manager"

(FYI, the pineapple is a sign of hospitality...)

Honestly I'm so bitter, and so in need of a good vent and because everybody glamorizes my job so much, I feel like Bitchless Bride is my only outlet. Any time I even come close to complaining about my event planning job (at an upscale hotel), my friends with normal jobs give me the eye. I swear they seriously think that all I do is throw lavish parties, eat and drink the food, and schmooze with the clientele. Really? As BB says every Tuesday, the truth hurts. Because, here's the reality. I do throw lavish parties. But, it's not like I am hanging out enjoying the fruits of my planning. And, I would get in deep shit if I ate the food or drank the beverages, and frankly usually the clientele is downright brutal. So for all of you who think my job is just amazing or "so much fun", suck it.

To all of you brides, here's the truth about what you don't see.

1. I am drastically underpaid for the amount of hours I spend in this building. BB wasn't kidding when she said that if you divide the number of hours we industry people work by our pathetic salary, then I'm probably not making much more than somebody who works at McDonald's.

2. Tying into #1, as if the hours weren't bad enough, I have to show my beautiful face as much as humanly possible around the hotel. For example, I have to be in the lobby of the hotel a few times a month beginning at 7:30 AM for an hour and a half to greet people. Now, that sounds like no big deal, right? Wrong. It's actually a very big deal considering that I pull about 70 hours per week. Half the time I'm here (yes, I'm writing this at my desk) really early anyway, and taking time out of my busy day to stand in the lobby to say "hello" to people who can't be bothered to look up from their phone and acknowledge me is annoying. It just means that I will not get out of the building until 9 PM.

Communication Doesn't Have to be a Bitch!

2013-03-12T11:00:59Z

Written by "Shop Girl"

Let me start off by saying that I love my job. It thrills me to be part of such a special time in a woman’s life. Perhaps even a time she has dreamt about since she was a little girl. I know that finding "the" bridal gown is an extraordinary moment for the bride and everyone involved, and I too cry with happiness, when my brides find the perfect wedding dress!

Although, last Saturday I got a good cry at work, and unfortunately these were not tears of joy. Because I was so drained and turned off by this horrible bride, I thought I would share my experience as a lesson to all of you brides out there. Here's the rundown... I'll number it to make it easy on you:

1. (As a friendly reminder) Brides, it’s busy season. That means we (and probably several other vendors in the wedding industry) are booked SOLID with scheduled appointments. In fact, we are booked so solid that should you need to cancel your appointment with us, it is company policy for us to ask you upon cancelling, if you are SURE you need to cancel, because there’s a waiting list of brides that will happily take your slot.

2. Don't show up to your CANCELLED appointment (15 minutes late at that!). Period.

3. If you didn't listen to number 2, then keep in mind that it's not fair for you to be pissed off when we are not lining up, jumping up and down, trying to help you when you show up to said cancelled appointment. You should be happy that I tried to accommodate you in the first place, while at the same time I'm struggling to assist the bride-to-be who gladly took your appointment.

4. Please don't be upset that I couldn't remember you from the bridal show six months ago. Keep in mind, I met over 500 other brides that day too.

Stop Penny Pinching Me, Bitch!!

2013-03-05T09:01:03Z

Written by The Invitation Whore Next Door

Unfortunately, I feel as though I need to state that for the record that I put my heart and soul into the invitations (amongst other things) that I create. And because I consider my pricing to be reasonable and fair, I do not offer discounts. A few years ago, I had a client (who I had worked with in the past) come to me for her middle son’s Bar Mitzvah. Immediately, she asked if I could offer a discount, and I apologized, but said, “no”. I told her that with her purchase, a free proof is provided, and with any order over $1000.00, shipping is included. When she picked up her order, she said that I really needed to rethink the foundation of my business because as a repeat client who has spent a decent amount of money with me, I should show my appreciation by throwing something in.

Brides, Show a Little Respect... Keep Your Appointments or Cancel Them!

2013-02-12T09:00:27Z

Written by The Bitter Baker

I think we need a vendor rant about keeping appointments and the proper etiquette around vendor appointments in general. Unfortunately, I, a wedding cake baker, just got screwed by a bride who had spent several days emailing me about when to come in for an appointment. When we finally narrowed down the date and time, I had to reschedule a cake delivery for 3 hours earlier in order to accommodate (which was fine). Although because of the recent storm, I emailed her to reschedule, and received a response that said, "We are going with someone else recommended by a very close friend." Hmmm… you know what that tells me? She wasn’t going to show up for our appointment. If I hadn’t emailed her to cancel, then she would have blown me off.

Don't be a Slacker, Bridey... Why You Should Order Your Wedding Dress Early

2013-02-05T09:00:26Z

Written by The Bridal Bitch

Ladies, I am baffled… Yes, baffled at the absolute nonchalance that I am seeing when it comes to ordering your dress. I know this doesn’t apply to all of you. Many of you are out there finalizing those dress decisions eight months to a year before your wedding. And, lets be honest… some of you threw caution to the wind and tried on a dress or two before he dropped to one knee and proposed. I even saw one devotee of The Secret who went out and bought THE DRESS before there was even THE GUY!! But, what's up with the rest of you? You know who you are! You're the ones with four or five months left to go before the big day who still haven't pulled the trigger and ordered your dress! Yes! You! With the May or June Wedding!! Are you planning on marching down the aisle in your birthday suit?

Why is it Okay for the Officiant to Make the Rules?

2012-10-24T13:31:21Z

Really- it's ok to rant and be a bitch for tiny moment? I had to shoot a wedding at a Holiday Inn before you giggle, it's really lovely, it's in a downtown area with a rooftop terrace. I want to write Holiday Inn and tell them that brides don't want to say their wedding is at the Holiday Inn, but I digress.

So everyone is lined up getting ready to walk in, I'm so stoked my bride is half Hawaiian and half African American so she is lovely and perfect and charming... The sweetest girl, it's like she doesn't even know how bad- ass she is. Literally one minute before we they walk in, her pastor looks at me and says, "you aren't allowed up front, you have to stay in the back."

Bridey, You're Nothing But a Waste of Time

2012-09-26T11:30:02Z

Written by Castoff Cakes...

Once upon a time, a groom contacted me about two months before his wedding date. When I took the call, I was heading out the door for a week long electronics-free vacation, so I said congratulations, took down his info, and promised to call him back as soon as I returned.

Delusional, Crazy and Entitled, Oh My!

2012-09-20T00:54:07Z

Written by the Pissed Off Planner...

Seriously!?! I want to stick a firework up this bride's backside, and watch the explosions like a belated 4th of July weekend!! She is somewhat similar to BB's bride who would CC her on every email, but sadly her CC habit is not her only issue! But, that is where I'll start...

This bride CC's me on every fucking email she sends! This morning, she emails me at the ass crack of dawn and then again before 9am to check if I got the first email she sent at 7.45am. And a third email asking for her timeline.... Her wedding is not until the end of November!! Bitch, I have EIGHT weddings to get through before I even look at your timeline!! Pull your head out of your ass, please!! You are not my only bride.

Weddings "Worn" with Experience

2012-09-17T14:21:26Z

From the Desk of the Tuxedo Mask:

Let me tell you about a GROOMZILLA that made himself look like an ass. This little Napoleon-sized man has an attitude far larger than his body can support.

Let Them Eat Cake?

2012-09-05T14:22:32Z

From the Desk of the Fed Up Baker...

If I get one more request for a third sampling of chocolate cake I swear I will punch someone.

Seriously...Have you tasted chocolate before? What about that other exotic flavor "vanilla?" Or maybe you want to go really wild and try this thing you've heard about but never had called "almond."