Wedding Planning Guide

***FLASHBACK*** Five Ways Not to be a Nightmare Disguised as a Daydream

Yup, I totally just stole a line from Taylor Swift, but why come up with another awesome line when one already exists? Right? Anyway, the point is, right now, so many of you are recently engaged, and while I truly believe that you don't think you're a nightmare, inevitably, the majority of you? Yeah, you're going turn into a fucking nightmare, and totally think you're a dreamboat. The fix? Well, leave that to me. Here are five ways to avoid turning into your very own nightmare disguised as a daydream:

1. Bridey, remember that just because you are getting married doesn't mean that everyone else is. All of your friends and family? Well, they're probably in different phases of their lives, and therefore it shouldn't be surprising to you that after the allotted "honeymoon" phase of your engagement, you will lose their undivided attention. Because some friends? Well, some are jealous of what you have, some are having babies, some are getting divorced, and some just don't give a shit about your wedding! So, bridey, remember that this is your phase, and not everyone is in it with you. 

2. Be a good listener. Those phases I just mentioned? Well, your friends and family will probably want/need some air time once you've finished talking about what's on your mind. Yes, bridey, you're newly engaged and dying to talk and obsess about every painstaking detail of your wedding day, but your friends have shit happening in their lives too. So, listen! And care! Give them the floor once in a while. Breathe. It's not about you all of the time...

3. Uh-oh... The P word! Um, I'm talking about perspective!! Yup! You're wedding is one day out of your entire life, bridey. One.fucking.day. And there's a ton of shit you'll probably have to overcome with your partner after that one day. Personally? I dealt with nearly losing my hus to pulmonary embolisms (less than a year after we were married). And then there was the whole IVF journey. What a shitshow... (Yeah, you spend all of your 20s trying NOT to get pregnant, and when you're finally ready, you can't! WTF?) And then several ups and downs thereafter... So, while I look back at my wedding day fondly, I usually find myself reflecting on the marriage, and our concrete foundation, not the day.

4. You don't know shit. You are new to this whole wedding planning bit, so quit pretending like you know everything. Do your research. And, no that doesn't mean "pin" your research, I mean really do your research, bridey. Research your wedding as if you're going to spend the equivalent of a down payment for a home on one day... Oh wait... You are! So, own it bridey! Own the shit out of your wedding! Know what you're getting yourself into. Make a point of understanding what things cost in the industry. Hire professionals to help you do so. Either way, educate yourself, and do it honestly! Act as though there was a price tag on every pin. 

5. Be fucking nice... to everyone. Because, bridey, in my world? You are a nightmare first, and then, if you're lucky, you become my daydream. And, if you're nice and genuine? Then people (inside of the industry and out) will genuinely want to help you plan your wedding. They will care about the details, they will care how you feel about the linen or food or wedding cake, and most of all, they will care about you! But, if you treat everyone like crap, then you will get crap in return. 

Got it?

Image via magic4walls

The Truth Hurts Tuesday ~ Bridey, Five Ways Not to be a Nightmare Disguised as a Daydream

Yup, I totally just stole a line from Taylor Swift, but why come up with another awesome line when one already exists? Right? Anyway, the point is, right now, so many of you are recently engaged (ahem... Christmas), and while I truly believe that you don't think you're a nightmare, inevitably, the majority of you? Yeah, you're going turn into a fucking nightmare, and totally think you're a dreamboat. The fix? Well, leave that to me. Here are five ways to avoid turning into your very own nightmare disguised as a daydream:

1. Bridey, remember that just because you are getting married doesn't mean that everyone else is. All of your friends and family? Well, they're probably in different phases of their lives, and therefore it shouldn't be surprising to you that after the allotted "honeymoon" phase of your engagement, you will lose their undivided attention. Because some friends? Well, some are jealous of what you have, some are having babies, some are getting divorced, and some just don't give a shit about your wedding! So, bridey, remember that this is your phase, and not everyone is in it with you. 

2. Be a good listener. Those phases I just mentioned? Well, your friends and family will probably want/need some air time once you've finished talking about what's on your mind. Yes, bridey, you're newly engaged and dying to talk and obsess about every painstaking detail of your wedding day, but your friends have shit happening in their lives too. So, listen! And care! Give them the floor once in a while. Breathe. It's not about you all of the time...

3. Uh-oh... The P word! Um, I'm talking about perspective!! Yup! You're wedding is one day out of your entire life, bridey. One.fucking.day. And there's a ton of shit you'll probably have to overcome with your partner after that one day. Personally? I dealt with nearly losing my hus to pulmonary embolisms (less than a year after we were married). And then there was the whole IVF journey. What a shitshow... (Yeah, you spend all of your 20s trying NOT to get pregnant, and when you're finally ready, you can't! WTF?) And then several ups and downs thereafter... So, while I look back at my wedding day fondly, I usually find myself reflecting on the marriage, and our concrete foundation, not the day.

4. You don't know shit. You are new to this whole wedding planning bit, so quit pretending like you know everything. Do your research. And, no that doesn't mean "pin" your research, I mean really do your research, bridey. Research your wedding as if you're going to spend the equivalent of a down payment for a home on one day... Oh wait... You are! So, own it bridey! Own the shit out of your wedding! Know what you're getting yourself into. Make a point of understanding what things cost in the industry. Hire professionals to help you do so. Either way, educate yourself, and do it honestly! Act as though there was a price tag on every pin. 

5. Be fucking nice... to everyone. Because, bridey, in my world? You are a nightmare first, and then, if you're lucky, you become my daydream. And, if you're nice and genuine? Then people (inside of the industry and out) will genuinely want to help you plan your wedding. They will care about the details, they will care how you feel about the linen or food or wedding cake, and most of all, they will care about you! But, if you treat everyone like crap, then you will get crap in return. 

Got it?

Image via magic4walls

The Truth Hurts Tuesday ~ FLASHBACK: Five Crucial Wedding Appointment Etiquette Guidelines

***You'll never guess why I'm posting this one again, right? Well, I was having a rather heated conversation with an industry friend the other night, and a few cocktails later, we came to the conclusion that brides are just fucking rude when it comes to the unwritten rules of wedding planning. When suddenly, I had an overwhelming sense of déjà vu, and then I remembered that I had written the rules in 2013! Check it out!***

February 12, 2013:

I feel like I need to piggyback off of our Vendor Vent for today... It's an important topic, so if you haven't read it, bridey, then check it out. It's a touchy subject for the industry because we are really tired of being taken advantage of, particularly when it comes to appointments... Making them, keeping them, and fucking around with our time. Therefore you need to know the rules of engagement (sorry, couldn't help it!). Ready?

Wedding Appointment Etiquette ~ Five Crucial Guidelines to Follow:

1. Here's my absolute favorite... Bridey, don't ever just "walk-in" to a hotel, bakery, dress shop, photography studio, etc. expecting to be seen, and then get pissed off if you have to wait or are turned away because they can't see you. If you've purchased my wedding planning guide, then you know that this is a big no-no. I mean, you would never just "walk-in" to your doctor's office demanding to be seen, would you? No. And if you did, then the nice lady behind the counter would most likely put you in your place. So please, pay us the same courtesy and phone first. Make an appointment so that we can be prepared for your arrival versus feeling annoyed because you assumed that you could be seen simply because you walked in. 

2. Once you make an appointment, keep it or cancel it with plenty of notice. Going back to the doctor's office example... In most cases you are required to cancel 24-48 hours ahead of time or else you will be charged. Actually, it's becoming more and more common for restaurants, salons, etc. to charge you for not canceling your reservations, appointments, etc., and honestly, I'm surprised we haven't started following suit! Because if you knew that you'd have to pay for our time lost due to no-showing, then I'm sure you'd call to cancel. Right?

3. If you are running late, then please call to let us know particularly if your appointment is scheduled after normal business hours. If you are running early, fantastic! But, don't expect to be seen just because you are a half hour earlier then expected. We may be with another client or we may just need to clear our desks before the meeting...

4. Don't bring an entourage to your appointment. We are interested in your thoughts, your needs and your expectations. When you bring more people to your appointment, then you bring more opinions. So please, give us the opportunity to hear it from you and not everybody else. Because you are the one we are trying to please.

5. Respect our time. I can tell you right now that no wedding vendor needs to sit with you for three hours during an initial consultation. This is especially true (and quite painful) if your meeting started at 6 PM. I'm not saying that you shouldn't discuss everything that is important to you, I'm simply saying that you don't need to talk about your who's coming to your wedding, how much weight you want to lose, your crazy MOH, etc. We care, but after three hours, our excitement starts to wane.

Bridey, you know that I am a straight shooter, and this information is important when you are planning your wedding. I know you want to be respectful, so if you follows these five rules of engagement, then you should be all set. Got it?

Photo via Blessed Events Fashioned by Adrianne

FREAKING OUT FRIDAY!!!

OMG... Remember last year how I wrote the Wedding Planning Guide? Well, I did, and it was so well received by you brideys, that I thought I would make it even more accessible. So, with a few minor adjustments and a lovely lower price, now ALL of you can plan like a planner for under 10 bucks! How awesome is that? 

A few of you mentioned that while you loved my guide, you didn't really need some of the "other" stuff. Well, I listened, brideys. I separated the timeline and budget templates from the guide. So, if you absolutely need to know how to plot your wedding day down to the minute, or you really suck at budgeting, then you should get the whole guide. But, if you're pretty savvy with logistics and money, then get the Kindle edition. 

Bridey, not only do I know how much you will enjoy reading my book (because it really is FAB and funny), but with each page, you are that much closer to a being a Bitchless Bride.

ENJOY!

XO,

BB

The Truth Hurts Tuesday ~ Five Crucial Wedding Appointment Etiquette Guidelines

I feel like I need to piggyback off of our Vendor Vent for today... It's an important topic, so if you haven't read it, bridey, then check it out. It's a touchy subject for the industry because we are really tired of being taken advantage of, particularly when it comes to appointments... Making them, keeping them, and fucking around with our time. Therefore you need to know the rules of engagement (sorry, couldn't help it!). Ready?

Wedding Appointment Etiquette ~ Five Crucial Guidelines to Follow:

1. Here's my absolute favorite... Bridey, don't ever just "walk-in" to a hotel, bakery, dress shop, photography studio, etc. expecting to be seen, and then get pissed off if you have to wait or are turned away because they can't see you. If you've purchased my wedding planning guide, then you know that this is a big no-no. I mean, you would never just "walk-in" to your doctor's office demanding to be seen, would you? No. And if you did, then the nice lady behind the counter would most likely put you in your place. So please, pay us the same courtesy and phone first. Make an appointment so that we can be prepared for your arrival versus feeling annoyed because you assumed that you could be seen simply because you walked in. 

The Kick-Ass, Broke-Ass and Bitch-Less Monday...

Today, I’m a whore. Today this post is dedicated to me, to moi, Bitchless Bride! I deserve a day to myself every now and then, right? So, are you curious why today is about BB? 

Well, as most of you know, I wrote a pretty fantastic wedding planning guide, Plan Like a Planner, A Revolutionary Wedding Planning Guide, and I am absolutely freaking out because Dana (the hot redhead pictured above) with The Broke-Ass Bride wants to include my wedding planning guide in her "Best New Wedding Books For Newbie Brides"! Right? I know! How fucking cool is THAT? So, kudos to me. Yes, I just used the word “kudos”, and yes I was referring to myself when I said it, but I don’t care! I am absolutely thrilled that Dana is interested in presenting something I worked incredibly hard to create on her fabulous site!

If you haven’t visited The Broke-Ass Bride, then get on it bridey! Not only is it a fantastic site for brides-to-be, but also Dana and her team speak the truth about weddings and have proven to be a great resource during the wedding planning process. Every day, she and her team demonstrate that you don’t have to break the bank to have a killer wedding. And today, I am part of that team.

So, again… kudos to me!

Fantasy Friday... More like Reality Friday!

So, I totally LOVED all of your comments from last week's Fantasy Friday! And yes, for those of you who wanted to attend my fabulous fantasy wedding, you're all invited! Just bring the hus and me a damn good present! 

Anyway, I know that today is Fantasy Friday, but actually, I have two very juicy realities to share with you. I am so excited! How lucky for me, right?! Actually... How lucky for you, bridey! Because today, I will be unveiling a kick ass wedding planning guide that will be your absolute saviour during your wedding planning experience. It will feel as though I, Bitchless Bride, am your very own wedding planner. Pretty awesome, right?

Trust me, bridey, you are going to freak out (in a good way) when you see that I have included a customizable wedding day timeline (more like the wedding week!), a budget planner and everything you need to make sure you procure the best vendors for you!

Not only that, but I was just informed by 20/20 that although Bitchless Bride is too hot for TV, apparently I'm the perfect temp for their website! Yahoo! I will definitely let you know when it's live!!!

Photo Cred: {Old Hallowell Day}