Listen Up

So, I’m doin' fucking a freebie… No, I don’t usually do them, and yes I usually hate that I got myself involved, but every once in a while there is a cause you believe in, so you suck it up and “do work” as Big Black would say. The cause… Katherine and Darren. They are friends of mine who met in “the industry” working a tonzillion hours, and fell in love in the process. And because they are so busy planning everybody else’s weddings, there is no time to plan their own. Figures.

The good news? They “hired” me. The better news? They listen. Unequivocally. If I say that the color scheme is borderline whorehouse, and perhaps we should tone it down a bit, they listen. If I say there are plenty of beautiful red velvet wedding cakes that incorporate black without going vampire, and maybe they ought to sleep on an alternative, they sleep on it. You know WHY? Because this is my job. This is what I do, and their job is to understand that I, moi, am the expert. I am the liaison between the dream, and the reality. I am the better version of your wedding. And because they are in “the industry”, they get it.

Brides, before your egg my house, I am not saying that my opinion (or any other wedding planner for that matter) is the end all be all, but if you are going to take the time to hire one (and a good one), then fucking listen to what they have to say. I recently worked with a bride who hired a photographer I hadn’t worked with (nor heard of), but because some chick she knows used them, she really wanted to give them a whirl. I mean, if you are going to rage against the machine and go outside of my network, fine… suit yourself… But not with the photographers! Frankly, if the photographer fucks up, it can not only ruin your wedding day (from a personality standpoint), but your experience every time you open that awful album for years to come. 

The lesson here? If you choose to hire a wedding planner, then resign yourself to the idea of being open-minded. Listen as they educate you. Listen as they talk to you about what’s in your best interest. I am not necessarily saying that you have to adapt to their aesthetic or point of view; I am saying that if you ask a question about design, food or music, then be open to hearing all of your options, even if it’s not what you originally had in mind. I mean if David Tutera can pull off a Halloween wedding without it being a tacky mess, AND still please the bride, then it is possible to have the wedding you want… if you listen to your planner. So quit being a bitch and listen up!