Bridey, I recognize that perhaps I have been a little bit hard on you with my last two THTs, "Don't be Mental..." and "BB's PSA #2... Be Pleasant While You Plan", so this week, I really want to focus on taking care of you. Look, I understand where your craziness comes from; I get how fucking hard it is to plan a wedding, have a full time job and be an attentive friend and fiance, AND keep your shit together. That said, I have the perfect anecdote to make you feel better the world you're currently living in, and at the same time, hopefully it will help you ditch the bullshit that forces you to feed into the hysteria... The hysteria that the wedding industry has successfully instilled in that pretty head of yours.
So, the other morning, I had a breakfast meeting with a very cool, very busy bride of mine. And when I say busy, I truly mean it. This chick? She's a nurse with crazy hours, in a super emotionally charged environment with draining responsibilities. See what I mean? This bride is actually busy. Her job can sometimes be life and death, so obviously, her wedding planning isn't always top of mind. Anyway, as lovely as our breakfast was, I bluntly asked her, "Lindsey, what's on your mind? Why were you so anxious to meet?" After a deep breath and somewhat of a dramatic pause, she said, "Because, I feel like there is something we should be doing."
Bridey, Lindsey's wedding isn't until late fall, and her venue is solidified, her vendors hired, the save the dates finalized... So, what the fuck is there to do now? Nothing. Enjoy life. Smell the fucking flowers... But, that's where the hysteria of the wedding industry comes into play... God forbid a bride takes a breather (when there's actually nothing to do). God forbid her every waking second isn't filled with something bridal... Seriously! There is so much bullshit out there dictating how you, bridey, are supposed to feel, and what you should be doing, that when there is actually nothing to be done at a particular point in time, you are made to feel uncomfortable.
And unfortunately, it's not just the wedding industry that has gotten to you. It's everybody! It's everybody that the wedding industry has gotten to too... "Well, you should be doing.... Blah blah blah..." or "I can't believe you haven't done... Blah blah blah..." And that shit will make you cray cray! Bridey, filter out the noise and tell them to FUCK OFF! It's okay to feel comfortable with where you left off with your wedding plans. But, you can't, can you? No! I mean... How could you feel comfortable with your own wedding plans when we we live in the world of stupid fucking wedding shows that are all the same (and not at all educational, just delusional), and all of the pretty pictures on all of the pretty wedding blogs, and the chicks that actually do drop a couple hundred grand on their weddings??? Right? No wonder why you need me to keep you in line! If I didn't know better, I'd lose my fucking mind too!
So, gently, I expressed this to Lindsey, and told her that it's okay to feel at ease with the wedding planning down time, and that I would absolutely help keep her on track. And, not to mention, there are SEVERAL apps, websites, wedding planning guides (duh, like mine), etc. that will do the same. Wedding check lists with timelines... Invest in one, and save yourself!!!
In a nutshell, bridey, stop feeding into the hysteria of the wedding industry! It doesn't have to be all about your wedding all of the time. That's exactly how you become a total bitch and lash out to the people who are trying to help you. So, quit while you're ahead, and stop the insanity!
Image via Vigen BeautiStory